Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
