is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Randomize