I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
