I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
