That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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