So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
