You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize