You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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