is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
