On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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