You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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