I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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