what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Randomize
