i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
pop tarts are not kleenex
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
