check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Randomize
