You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I cut my penus on the lid.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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