sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
