I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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