I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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