doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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