What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize