I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
