i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
40s are totally the cure
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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