My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize