Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
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