Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
