I wanna bring you to show and tell
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
