Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
