Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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