HIV tests are more positive than that guy
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
