So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Mom said you looked used
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
