You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
