Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
