: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
