I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Randomize