we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
