if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Randomize