i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
