Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
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