I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Randomize
