u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
