I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize