Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
