I don't usually arrange sex via text message
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
