I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Randomize
