if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
