i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
