And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
you would pick up someone in the library
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Randomize