I don't usually arrange sex via text message
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
areolas are like halos for boobs.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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