Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
