It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
